is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
So apparently I’m into choking now
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