Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
