So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
