This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
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