Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
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