I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
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