i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
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