He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Randomize
