If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
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