you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
