I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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