What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
