Kiss
Puke
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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