ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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