Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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