I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
