I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
