ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
