You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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