Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Randomize
