why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Randomize
