The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
