he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
