Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
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