Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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