it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
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