it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Randomize
