i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
