At least make sure they are 18
Why
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
