she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
