I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
