hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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