STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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