Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
