i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
How many fucks given?
0.12846
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
