either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
