I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
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