some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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