...so i touched it.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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