Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
