ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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