I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
