Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
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