I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
