You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Randomize
