Three words: puerto rican gang bang
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Randomize
