i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
It's blow job season.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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