Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
