I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
