Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
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